The following quotes have made me laugh in the last 24 hours. Those which are left un-attributed have been left that way to protect the innocent.
"Thanks for the 'non-solution.'" (air quotes used here)
"I'd rather blow a horse."
"I pretty much have toothpaste around my mouth... at all times."
"Oh my gosh, it's so cold in here, I have mosquito titties all over my arms!"
And finally, one from TV last night:
"Wherever you go, around every corner you turn, I'll be waiting... nude." (Jack on Will and Grace)